Hi, my name is Roger Buzby and I am a murderer. Not in the literal I-just-went-out-and-physically-killed-someone way but in the Matthew 5:21-26 sort of way. In other words, I have hate in my heart towards someone. A lot of someones actually. I find myself today in an epic struggle with not only my inner zombie, that is a daily struggle, but with God as well.
With the judgement handed down by the Supreme Court today on the Affordable Healthcare Act (aka Obamacare) the liberty of every American has been trampled into the dirt and our Constitution all but rendered of no consequence. To add insult to injury the Chief Justice himself, long thought by myself and many others to be a conservative, cast the deciding vote to uphold the law by declaring that the individual mandate was not, in fact, a mandate at all but could be considered a tax. This blatant attack on individual liberty has me almost literally foaming at the mouth. My zombie of course is happy with this and has been trying to get me to consider truly horrific ways to fight back. I am battling very hard within my mind not to dwell on these things, but it is hard.
I am reminded of another government that acted with blatant disregard for its citizens and ran roughshod over them first with taxes and then with martial law. The citizenry finally had enough and through a long and bloody struggle overthrew said government and established a new republic in it's place. The overthrown government was, as I'm sure you have figured out, the British Empire. Now we find our own government, the government designed to avoid this kind of tyranny, perpetrating the same injustices upon us and there is a part of me that longs for someone to sound the call and rally the troops to fight them. The question that is plaguing me now is, "Can I, as a Christian, partake in this kind of violent revolution when the cause seems so just?!".
My quandary lies in the fact that in longing for revolution I am holding hate in my heart towards those who are responsible for forcing this tyranny upon myself, my family and my fellow countrymen. According to Matthew 5:21-26 says that in doing this I am breaking the commandment not to kill because the intent of my heart is not in line with God's. My desire to see a revolution that will restore the liberties lost over the last 100+ years is in direct violation of God's command not to kill. Furthermore, Jesus goes even further in verse 38-42 of the same chapter in refuting the idea of an eye for an eye. He says not to resist an evil person but to turn the other cheek or go twice the distance commanded! There is a part of me that rails and this, that is outraged at the very notion of what seems to me to be being instructed to simply roll over and play dead. How can this be right?! How can this possibly be what God wants me to do when evil abounds and my rights and liberties are being trampled upon and stripped from me against my will?!!
Ultimately though God is in control. In Romans 9 Paul talks about the sovereignty of God. Romans 8:28 tells me that all things work for good for those who love the Lord and are called according to his purpose. How do I know I love Him, I mean really love Him and not just say I do? Jesus said in John 14:15 that if we love him we will obey him. Wow, that's a hard teaching to follow. My zombie would have me ignore this and go right on looking for a way to take back my liberties, by force if necessary but I can't, not and truly be a Christian.
Does that mean I can't do anything? I don't think so. Our Founding Fathers put in place a system of government that gives us a way to exert control over our government in a non-violent way. The system has become corrupt and is severely broken but if enough people get involved and make their desires known via that system I believe we can turn this ship around. Of course God is ultimately in control. It is well within the realm of possibility that this is the beginning of the end and no amount of political involvement will be able to change this. In that case it is more important than ever that we obey the teachings of Jesus, even the ones that we don't like because ultimately that is how we will prove whether we genuinely love him.
Fight the Zombie Inside
Romans 7:15-25
Friday, June 29, 2012
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
Zombie Food: Frustration
I am so frustrated at the moment that I have caught myself literally grinding my teeth. I hate it when people won't communicate, especially when there are looming deadlines. I mean, come on, even if your answer is, "I don't know" at least it IS an answer! The more I've mulled the situation over the more frustrated I have become, to the point where I have given serious (if brief) consideration to throwing up my hands and walking away from the whole situation.
We've all been in this spot, where our frustration at a person or situation has either made us consider quitting or maybe we did quit. I've traveled this road so many times it's not funny and many times I have acted upon this impulse to just walk away. Unfortunately that reaction almost never ends well. The reason is that I didn't take into account if that was what God wanted me to do.
See, my inner zombie feeds on my frustration and uses that as a way to manipulate me into making a decision that removes me from doing what God has called me to do. Okay, so the zombie doesn't so much feed on our frustration but feeds into it, causing me to become angry and make poor decisions. I must constantly be aware of this and when those feelings and thoughts come up I must make a conscious decision not to act impulsively but to seek to do God's will no matter how I might be feeling.
The other side of this, if it is an individual or individuals that we are frustrated with, is that we must deal with the situation in a godly manner. That means following the guidelines given in Matthew 18. I hate confrontation so this is even more difficult for me than most people. Of course, as I've learned how to follow these simple instructions I've learned that most of the times things can be worked out. Of course that does mean that actual communication is involved and since that's the problem I am having (my communications aren't being answered in any form) this does put a wrench in things. Of course I've also learned that if I try hard enough I can usually track folks down and deal with things.
While I've learned not to quit in anger sometimes God does use these situations to show me that He wants me to go in a different direction. The key is to not act rashly and seek God's guidance and then do what He says. It isn't easy, especially when my emotions get in the way but hey, Jesus didn't promise us an easy life, he promised to make it worthwhile.
So now that I've ranted a bit I'm feeling a bit more calm. Time to try calling again...
We've all been in this spot, where our frustration at a person or situation has either made us consider quitting or maybe we did quit. I've traveled this road so many times it's not funny and many times I have acted upon this impulse to just walk away. Unfortunately that reaction almost never ends well. The reason is that I didn't take into account if that was what God wanted me to do.
See, my inner zombie feeds on my frustration and uses that as a way to manipulate me into making a decision that removes me from doing what God has called me to do. Okay, so the zombie doesn't so much feed on our frustration but feeds into it, causing me to become angry and make poor decisions. I must constantly be aware of this and when those feelings and thoughts come up I must make a conscious decision not to act impulsively but to seek to do God's will no matter how I might be feeling.
The other side of this, if it is an individual or individuals that we are frustrated with, is that we must deal with the situation in a godly manner. That means following the guidelines given in Matthew 18. I hate confrontation so this is even more difficult for me than most people. Of course, as I've learned how to follow these simple instructions I've learned that most of the times things can be worked out. Of course that does mean that actual communication is involved and since that's the problem I am having (my communications aren't being answered in any form) this does put a wrench in things. Of course I've also learned that if I try hard enough I can usually track folks down and deal with things.
While I've learned not to quit in anger sometimes God does use these situations to show me that He wants me to go in a different direction. The key is to not act rashly and seek God's guidance and then do what He says. It isn't easy, especially when my emotions get in the way but hey, Jesus didn't promise us an easy life, he promised to make it worthwhile.
So now that I've ranted a bit I'm feeling a bit more calm. Time to try calling again...
Wednesday, June 6, 2012
Zombie Mind Control: Addictions
While I have a blog with the word zombie in the title I have to admit I was shocked recently to hear about the "zombie attack" in Miami. You know, the one where a man was munching on the face of another guy...on a bridge......while naked. Yeah, total disbelief on my part until I read the reports and watched the news footage. It seemed almost unreal but when they mentioned that 'bath salts' were involved it became more believable.
Of course that got me thinking about the inner zombie and the role that addictions can play in that battle. It made me think about how once we give into the curiosity surrounding a possible addiction, whether a substance or behavior, we have really given the inner zombie a blank check to control us whenever it wants. Once we are addicted to a substance or behavior our resolve all but disappears whenever we are faced with the temptation to partake in that sin and the battle is over almost before it begins.
Now you may be thinking, "Sin? Really?! Isn't that a bit of a strong word to use, especially given that the person(s) are addicted and can't help themselves?". Well, as someone who struggles daily with an addiction, I can tell you that an addiction, if untreated and unrepented of, ends up usurping God's place in the life of that person and that is a sin. The first commandment is that we won't have any other gods before the one, true God.
Now I'm not saying we shouldn't treat the addicted with compassion or shun them, quite the contrary! We all deal with sin and many of us have suffered with an addiction of one sort or another. For me, and many other men in the world, it is pornography. I have to be very careful of what I watch and where I go online. I have software (http://www.x3watch.com/) that tracks where I go and reports to my accountability partners if I go to a suspicious site. I can't even walk by a Victoria's Secret without looking away. My wife is aware of my struggle with pornography and so are many other people, including you now. The more people who know the more people there are to help me not to fall into that trap. My inner zombie knows that if it can get me to partake in my addiction it can then use the subsequent guilt to manipulate me into sinning more and not necessarily by looking at porn. Once the guilt comes in I feel awful about myself. My natural instinct is to withdraw from God and those who know of my struggle, to try to hide it. I get angry very easily and you can kiss any kind of prayer life goodbye. In short, if my zombie can get me to indulge he can cut me off from the source of my strength, God Almighty.
Addictions are not things to be taken lightly and if you struggle with one then you know what I mean. If you aren't currently working to be free of your addiction I urge you to get help. You need people in your life who can help you as you struggle to resist the temptation to partake. You need to understand that there is no sin that can separate you from the love of God and you need to accept what Jesus has done for you. That is the only way to free yourself, by surrendering to God and submitting your will to His. In doing so you will find the greatest freedom you can know, freedom in Christ.
Does that mean you will no longer be tempted? No. It does mean that you won't be alone and that there is a strength far beyond your own that you can call upon to win each battle as it comes up and when you fail, you know that you can get back up, ask forgiveness and soldier on. You can be secure in the knowledge that Jesus will never leave you, nor forsake you and will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you can resist when you call upon His strength.
My prayers go out to the families of those involved in that gruesome scene in Miami and to the participants and witnesses of the event. May they turn to the Lord and find comfort.
Of course that got me thinking about the inner zombie and the role that addictions can play in that battle. It made me think about how once we give into the curiosity surrounding a possible addiction, whether a substance or behavior, we have really given the inner zombie a blank check to control us whenever it wants. Once we are addicted to a substance or behavior our resolve all but disappears whenever we are faced with the temptation to partake in that sin and the battle is over almost before it begins.
Now you may be thinking, "Sin? Really?! Isn't that a bit of a strong word to use, especially given that the person(s) are addicted and can't help themselves?". Well, as someone who struggles daily with an addiction, I can tell you that an addiction, if untreated and unrepented of, ends up usurping God's place in the life of that person and that is a sin. The first commandment is that we won't have any other gods before the one, true God.
Now I'm not saying we shouldn't treat the addicted with compassion or shun them, quite the contrary! We all deal with sin and many of us have suffered with an addiction of one sort or another. For me, and many other men in the world, it is pornography. I have to be very careful of what I watch and where I go online. I have software (http://www.x3watch.com/) that tracks where I go and reports to my accountability partners if I go to a suspicious site. I can't even walk by a Victoria's Secret without looking away. My wife is aware of my struggle with pornography and so are many other people, including you now. The more people who know the more people there are to help me not to fall into that trap. My inner zombie knows that if it can get me to partake in my addiction it can then use the subsequent guilt to manipulate me into sinning more and not necessarily by looking at porn. Once the guilt comes in I feel awful about myself. My natural instinct is to withdraw from God and those who know of my struggle, to try to hide it. I get angry very easily and you can kiss any kind of prayer life goodbye. In short, if my zombie can get me to indulge he can cut me off from the source of my strength, God Almighty.
Addictions are not things to be taken lightly and if you struggle with one then you know what I mean. If you aren't currently working to be free of your addiction I urge you to get help. You need people in your life who can help you as you struggle to resist the temptation to partake. You need to understand that there is no sin that can separate you from the love of God and you need to accept what Jesus has done for you. That is the only way to free yourself, by surrendering to God and submitting your will to His. In doing so you will find the greatest freedom you can know, freedom in Christ.
Does that mean you will no longer be tempted? No. It does mean that you won't be alone and that there is a strength far beyond your own that you can call upon to win each battle as it comes up and when you fail, you know that you can get back up, ask forgiveness and soldier on. You can be secure in the knowledge that Jesus will never leave you, nor forsake you and will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you can resist when you call upon His strength.
My prayers go out to the families of those involved in that gruesome scene in Miami and to the participants and witnesses of the event. May they turn to the Lord and find comfort.
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